Israel and Hamas are close geographically and worlds apart in mindset—the role of hope and hate in setting national priorities and determining purpose.
Multiple brain structures involved in fear work in an interplay of swift reactions meant to preserve and protect life, usually from saber-tooth tigers, but today real or imagined threats.
If the concept of self-care were broadened to include devoting my energy to attend to all my needs, wants, thoughts and feelings, the either/or dilemma might recede.